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A funny story for the month of November where we pray for the souls of our dearly departed. During my sophomore year of college, I cleaned people's houses to make enough money to get by. One house that I cleaned was the home of a very elderly couple, who really didn't dirty up the house that much. I was supposed to be there for three hours of cleaning, but after changing the bed sheets, vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom, and a few other minor things, there wasn't too much to do. So, one day, I decided to deep clean a bit more and clean areas that were neglected or hard to reach. Now, if you asked my husband what is one of the reasons he fell in love with me, he would jokingly tell you that it was because of my clumsiness. Grace is not my middle name and I'm known for my fantastic, clumsy incidents. Anyway, knowing my tendency to fall, I still grabbed an unsteady chair to climb on while I cleaned a very high mantle over the fireplace. I really had to stretch to grab things off so that I could dust the wooden ledge. One of the things was a squat vase with a lid and when I grabbed it, I was surprised at how heavy it was. But, as I was standing there on this rickety chair, with this vase over my head, the old gentleman of the house came into the kitchen and said, "You know what's in that jar?" "No," I replied back. "That's my sister!" Heh. Heh. My heart started beating fast as I could just picture myself toppling off the chair with 'ole sis in my hands. And as I fell to the earth, the urn would crash to the ground spilling ashes everywhere. So, instead, of continuing to take down the urn, I said, "You know what, I'll just put this back up," and I gently, uneventfully, put the urn back in place. Moral of the story: 1. Don't sneak up on people when they are handling urns with people's ashes in them and 2. Just put people in the ground when they die and save all housecleaners from a potential disaster. HA! Have a great weekend, Catholic Pilgrims.
Continue ReadingI've posted this picture before, but I've been thinking about it--I think about it a lot actually--and so you all get to see it again today. Up near Calvary inside the Holy Sepulcher off to the left side, if facing the Calvary altar, there is a very dark area where you can light candles for prayers. When I went to place my lighted candle in the sand, I could sort of see the area beyond the candlelight. It is a dark, almost empty abyss which feels utterly mysterious. Since being there, my mind has drifted so many times to the moment I stood there with my lighted candle. There I was, with my light of faith, standing in darkness and unable to fully see the big picture. For many, many months now, I have been praying for certain things, certain outcomes and not a single one has been answered the way I have begged God to answer it. Each prayer hasn't been for me, but for others. Each prayer has been offered with the intention to align my will and my prayers with what I think God would want, but that doesn't seem to be the case. This has happened before and sometimes I have been able to clearly see the reason why God didn't answer as I requested. He gave me an even better answer. And sometimes, I see the outcome and it's not necessarily what I would consider a better answer back. It's okay, but there's still pain. It's not the utopia I had hoped for. Then, there are prayers where the outcome is completely confusing and heartbreaking and I don't understand. When this happens, I think of standing there with my little light, little Amy with my little light, near the place where Christ died on the Cross. There's darkness all around, I can barely see five feet in front of me and it all boils down to faith and trust. Christ at Calvary was the darkest of times and, yet, those that loved Christ didn't yet know of the glory that was soon to come. I must always remember that I only see what is right in front of me and even when times seem dark, I must trust that through it all, God has a plan. One that I may not fully understand even in this life. Have a blessed day, Catholic Pilgrims, and keep your little light shining.
Continue ReadingMy sophomore year or college, I was still doing the hypocrite thing where I called myself a Christian, but there was really not one thing in my life that would have pointed towards that. One of my roommates ended up having to leave our house because of some poor choices she made and the day she told me and our other roommates, I went absolutely nuclear on her. I screamed at her. Cussed at her. Called her names. Pointed out all her failings. All I wanted to do was make her feel small and terrible, because she was leaving us in a bind. So, "in the name of Jesus," I stood on my comically high soapbox and berated her for being a bad Christian. I just destroyed her. It is a high form of blasphemy to try to destroy people like that "in the name of Jesus." Truth be told, I was more angry with myself because the sins that led her to leave the house were sins that I was committing. However, I just needed to make myself feel better--to feel more righteous. It was not my shining moment. I have since apologized and asked forgiveness from her. But, I say all this because, here on the internet, I see that same behavior in many Catholic/Christian "influencers. If you follow someone who yells, cusses all the time, and who spends more time bashing others all in the "name of Jesus," you are following someone that has lost their way. Side note: Beware those that believe everything is a conspiracy, too. They may have kernels of truth in some things they say, but their hearts are not full of Christ. Instead they are filled with bitterness and I know because I used to be that way. I see my old self in them. It is important to speak truth, but it must be done well. It is important to spread the Gospel, but it must be done joyfully. It is important to call out evil, but we can't be evil ourselves when calling it out. Instead of these "influencers" and, heck, instead of me, read the Bible. Listen to podcasts where the Bible is read. Read the Saints. Or--shameless plug--listen to podcasts like mine where I read the Saints' works. Be influenced by those that were/are filled with joy, love, and hope and show us how to really do things in the name of Jesus and do it well. Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Tuesday, Catholic Pilgrims.
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