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Yesterday, my family went to the movies to watch “You Gotta Believe.” It’s a baseball movie based off a true story.
One of the coaches of the team comes down with brain cancer and it’s serious. He has to step back from coaching while he does chemo.
At one point in the story, this coach’s son, devastated that his father isn’t getting better, runs out on the ballfield at night and yells out to the sky, “I hate you! I hate you!”
That was enough to make the tears flow hot on my face because I once did just about the same thing, except it was a football field and I was 17.
After my night on the football field, I went on to “wrestle with God,” much like Jacob in the Bible for years.
Yesterday, after I got home from the movie, I read a comment on my post from the other day that was wildly misunderstood. So many people missed the point of my post on burdensome rules.
Anyway, a woman, still missing the point, commented that respecting Christ in the Eucharist means that we dress up for church and women cover their heads. Boom. End of discussion.
Part of me wanted to defend my deep love of Christ, but the Holy Spirit kept saying, “Stay. Just stay. Don’t do it.”
While I was standing there at the stove with tears in my eyes, I asked, “Why not? Why not let me defend my love for You?”
What I heard was, “Because for some, it will never be enough what you do. Let me handle it. I know your heart.”
I realized how true that is. Because we humans are always trying to one up each other and prove we are better, sometimes, it will never be enough for many.
I have been to the depths with God and fought my way back to a relationship that I never thought possible after that night on the football field. Nobody but God truly understands my love and respect and nobody ever will.
There are a million and one ways, Catholic Pilgrims, that we can practice our Faith. And even if we did all those ways, there would still be someone who comes along and says, “Not enough.”
Of course with God, we can never give Him enough, but the only one we need to prove anything to is Him. He knows our hearts and His understanding of our hearts is all that really matters.
Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Tuesday.
*Picture is from the synagogue in Capernaum from our Gospel reading today.
Have you ever gotten snagged by a headline like this on a video? "See what this former childhood star looks like today!" The other day, I saw a short video that had a picture of an emaciated, drug-addicted woman as its thumbnail and it said, "This 80s Beauty Now On the Streets!" Well, I bit and started watching. I quickly noticed was that the lady on the cover and the lady actually in the video were not the same people. They had put an AI generated homeless woman on the front to lure people in. The actual "80s beauty" was a different person. I stopped the video and thought to myself, "What an utter waste of time. I was so curious about something that's so insignificant, so pointless that's it's a bit embarrassing that I got suckered in." Then, about a week later, I started watching a long video on what dog breeds not to buy. This is utterly stupid for me to watch because a. I'm not a dog person and b. I'm not even remotely considering getting a dog. But..I was curious. Yesterday, while I was reading St. Augustine's book "Confessions" for my podcast, he was talking about the sin of curiosity. He was talking about how when our senses want something beautiful they know where to find it. Our eyes look at a beautiful work of art, our ears will listen to a harmonious tune, our nose seeks out fragrant perfume, and our sense of taste seeks something delicious. He goes on by saying that oftentimes to satisfy our curiosity, we seek out things that are in the reverse of the beautiful. People will look at a corpse, they will go to the theatre to see disfigured people put on display, they will read about something grotesque. None of these things add value to our lives or draw us closer to God. The information age can easily cause us to slip into the sin of curiosity. It's not bad to be curious, but what we are curious about is the problem. Or, if what we are investing all our time in leads us away from valuable time spent with family, friends, or God then it is a problem. The good, the true, and the beautiful are the things we should seek, Catholic Pilgrims. Nearly everything else is noise meant to distract us. Have a blessed Thursday.
Continue ReadingHey, Catholic Pilgrims, remember our small-town church series? Well, it's back! Well, before I started doing my ancestry research, I thought little of Kentucky. But, turns out, I had kin in Kentucky for, at least, over a century. Earliest that I can find for when they arrived in Kentucky was in 1803, though it might have been sooner. Our small-town church today hails from Falmouth, Kentucky up in the north of the state. This isn't where my family was located; they were more in the middle and the southern part of the state. There was an earlier church built in 1860, but the one you see here was dedicated on September 12th, 1880. If you look on a map, this church sits right next to Licking River and that's a problem when banks overflow. In 1937 and 1997, floodwaters caused a lot of damage to the church and its property. Those waters might have taken a "lick" out of things, but they couldn't swallow up things completely. I've only ever spent time at the very top of the state and on trips driving through. Now that I know my family resided in the state for a good bit, I'll have to give it more of my attention someday. But, if you are ever in Falmouth, Kentucky, stop by and visit St. Francis Xavier Church. Have a good day, Catholic Pilgrims.
Continue ReadingTwo weeks ago, my son and I were driving from California to Missouri to see my dad. My husband had to go TDY, so he couldn't come with us. I thought it would be fun to stay at KOAs in the cabins they have in order to make it a fun trip. Last summer, our son had a blast at the KOAs playing in the pool, getting ice cream, and playing the other outdoor games they provide. Our first night in a KOA was in Utah on a Sunday. After we got settled in our cabin, I decided to go look for dinner. I thought it would be fun to get some things at the Walmart deli section and have a picnic. Well, there wasn't much I could eat (gluten-free), so I decided to go hunt for a restaurant. For anyone who has driven through Utah on a Sunday, you know that most things are closed. That was the case for the small town we were in and as I drove around not finding any place open, I started to get frustrated. I'm happy that the Lord's Day is observed, but it was just something I hadn't accounted for. My son was growing increasingly upset. He was worried that we weren't going to be able to eat. Finally, we found a BBQ restaurant that was open. When we got back to the cabin, we called my husband. Our son started getting teary-eyed when he was telling his dad that he had been worried that we weren't going to be able to eat anything. It occurred to me that he saw my frustration and he didn't know if I would be able to pull through for us. After the phone call, I said to my son, "Jeremiah, even if I had to go without, I would have gotten you food. I was just trying to find something for the both of us. It may take some time, but I will always take care of you." It occurred to me that we can have this response to God when it seems He is delayed in answering our prayers. It's not that we see Him get frustrated like I did in my human weakness, but we wonder if He will pull through for us. Though He may not always answer in the way or the time frame we expect, God's heart is always "moved with pity for us." He hears our prayers, He knows what we need most. We just have to trust Him and the process, Catholic Pilgrims. Have a good Tuesday.
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