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Yesterday, my family went to the movies to watch “You Gotta Believe.” It’s a baseball movie based off a true story.
One of the coaches of the team comes down with brain cancer and it’s serious. He has to step back from coaching while he does chemo.
At one point in the story, this coach’s son, devastated that his father isn’t getting better, runs out on the ballfield at night and yells out to the sky, “I hate you! I hate you!”
That was enough to make the tears flow hot on my face because I once did just about the same thing, except it was a football field and I was 17.
After my night on the football field, I went on to “wrestle with God,” much like Jacob in the Bible for years.
Yesterday, after I got home from the movie, I read a comment on my post from the other day that was wildly misunderstood. So many people missed the point of my post on burdensome rules.
Anyway, a woman, still missing the point, commented that respecting Christ in the Eucharist means that we dress up for church and women cover their heads. Boom. End of discussion.
Part of me wanted to defend my deep love of Christ, but the Holy Spirit kept saying, “Stay. Just stay. Don’t do it.”
While I was standing there at the stove with tears in my eyes, I asked, “Why not? Why not let me defend my love for You?”
What I heard was, “Because for some, it will never be enough what you do. Let me handle it. I know your heart.”
I realized how true that is. Because we humans are always trying to one up each other and prove we are better, sometimes, it will never be enough for many.
I have been to the depths with God and fought my way back to a relationship that I never thought possible after that night on the football field. Nobody but God truly understands my love and respect and nobody ever will.
There are a million and one ways, Catholic Pilgrims, that we can practice our Faith. And even if we did all those ways, there would still be someone who comes along and says, “Not enough.”
Of course with God, we can never give Him enough, but the only one we need to prove anything to is Him. He knows our hearts and His understanding of our hearts is all that really matters.
Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Tuesday.
*Picture is from the synagogue in Capernaum from our Gospel reading today.
Today, I want to show you our culture's "beatitudes." Underneath our culture's, I'll put Christ's words so that you can see the contrast. Respected are the proud. (Blessed are the poor in spirit.) Admired are those that celebrate death. (Blessed are they who mourn.) Successful are those that are crass and brazen. (Blessed are the meek.) Powerful are those who believe that the ends justify the means. (Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness.) Popular are those who seek to cancel people. (Blessed are the merciful.) Satisfied are the lustful and indulgent. (Blessed are the clean of heart.) Dynamic are those that cause a scene. (Blessed are the peacemakers.) Intelligent are those that reject Christianity. (Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of the kingdom.) Now, what is going to be everybody's tendency is to look to their political opponents and start to point out all the ways they promote the culture's "beatitudes." That's going to be the tendency, but don't do it. Each side has problems and we all know it. I don't want this to be a political debate. Instead, look at yourself. Do you follow any of the world's ways over Christ's? It's hard to do, and I'll admit, I don't want to be honest about how I fail to live up to Christ's Beatitudes, but instead slip into what the culture encourages. But if your fingers itch to type about this person over here or that group over there, just pause, and reflect on yourself. We cannot fix other people or control them very well, but we can fix ourselves. It is far too easy to lay all the blame at everyone else's feet and never look within. It'll make you uncomfortable to do this and not just shift your focus on someone else; it made me uncomfortable. But, looking into our own soul and seeing where we can be better is what matters most. Have a blessed Sunday, Catholic Pilgrims.
Continue ReadingThis is a picture of the little room I go to nearly everyday for daily Mass on base. For the next two weeks, our chapel is getting new carpet installed and this means we can't have daily Mass in here. Side note: Yes, our entire chapel has carpet. It's base life, just roll with it. 😅 Anyway, on Sunday, Father had a bunch of the men move all our Blessed Sacrament Chapel stuff into a RE classroom so that we could still have daily Mass. Yesterday, my son and I showed up and Father was in the classroom putting the finishing touches on making it look as much like a little chapel as possible. He turned and smiled at me and said, "See, we can make this work!" He had lit the candles, brought in the statues, the altar was all ready and prepared, our chairs with kneelers were in place, and our holy water font was by the door. The only thing we couldn't bring in was the Tabernacle because it's bolted to the wall. It was really touching how much care he put in to making our temporary space feel like a tiny Catholic chapel. As Father was sitting there before Mass praying, I thought to myself, "There is only one man on this base out of thousands that work here that can give me Jesus in the Eucharist and it's Father Joseph. We can move rooms, change decor, and all that, but without him, I don't get the Eucharist." I was immensely grateful in that moment for Father and for all priests who go the distance to give the faithful the Eucharist. Father could have just cancelled daily Mass until the renovations were completed, but he didn't. He still is showing up to provide this life-giving sacrament. And I can only get it through his hands. No other man on base could provide it for me. They could try, but it would just remain plain 'ole bread. Thank God for the Sacrament of Holy Orders and for the good men who answer that call. We need you, priests. Without you standing in persona Christi, our souls would starve to death. Have a blessed Tuesday.
Continue ReadingWhat if you have an ugly, storied past like me? One that's full of awful sins and very bad decisions? What if you were the type of person who covered it well, or somewhat well? What if most people never knew all the terrible sins you committed? What if you think of yourself as damaged goods, the worst sinner, or beyond help? You may say to me, "No, Amy, you're the Catholic Pilgrim, you're just exaggerating your past. It couldn't be that bad." Well, it really was. Old Amy and Today Amy are like night and day. So, what gives? One thing that big 'ole sinners like to do is find some twisted victory in their sins. "Oh, I'm just too bad. Oh, God could never heal me. Oh, I'm beyond repair." There is no trophy for greatest sinner, yet a lot of people compete for it. Too many people want to see themselves as the one person that God couldn't possibly heal. Which is nonsense. Utter nonsense. Your sins don't make you unique or special. You are not bigger than God. So, you have two options: 1. Continue to wallow and lick your wounds forever hoping that your spit eventually will make you feel better. Or 2. Bring it all to Christ and let Him do what He does best--restore, heal, and cleanse. I was only ever beyond repair when I refused to let Christ in. Once I did, and surrendered to Him, trusting in His mercy and love, did things start to turn around. It didn't happen overnight and it was painful to be sure. I know now that everyday I need God to help me and give me the graces to keep moving in the right direction, which is towards Him. We all need Him, Catholic Pilgrims. Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Monday.
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