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Yesterday, my family went to the movies to watch “You Gotta Believe.” It’s a baseball movie based off a true story.
One of the coaches of the team comes down with brain cancer and it’s serious. He has to step back from coaching while he does chemo.
At one point in the story, this coach’s son, devastated that his father isn’t getting better, runs out on the ballfield at night and yells out to the sky, “I hate you! I hate you!”
That was enough to make the tears flow hot on my face because I once did just about the same thing, except it was a football field and I was 17.
After my night on the football field, I went on to “wrestle with God,” much like Jacob in the Bible for years.
Yesterday, after I got home from the movie, I read a comment on my post from the other day that was wildly misunderstood. So many people missed the point of my post on burdensome rules.
Anyway, a woman, still missing the point, commented that respecting Christ in the Eucharist means that we dress up for church and women cover their heads. Boom. End of discussion.
Part of me wanted to defend my deep love of Christ, but the Holy Spirit kept saying, “Stay. Just stay. Don’t do it.”
While I was standing there at the stove with tears in my eyes, I asked, “Why not? Why not let me defend my love for You?”
What I heard was, “Because for some, it will never be enough what you do. Let me handle it. I know your heart.”
I realized how true that is. Because we humans are always trying to one up each other and prove we are better, sometimes, it will never be enough for many.
I have been to the depths with God and fought my way back to a relationship that I never thought possible after that night on the football field. Nobody but God truly understands my love and respect and nobody ever will.
There are a million and one ways, Catholic Pilgrims, that we can practice our Faith. And even if we did all those ways, there would still be someone who comes along and says, “Not enough.”
Of course with God, we can never give Him enough, but the only one we need to prove anything to is Him. He knows our hearts and His understanding of our hearts is all that really matters.
Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Tuesday.
*Picture is from the synagogue in Capernaum from our Gospel reading today.
Throughout all my life, I have struggled with pride. In my late teens and all through my twenties, I thought that I could make the Christian faith what I wanted it to be. Essentially, this meant that it became so easy that it barely factored into my life. Yes, I called myself a Christian, but I thought: That church was optional. Prayer only mattered when I wanted something. Scripture was around for the virtue signal. I wasn't Catholic during those years, so Sacraments mattered nothing to me. I didn't even know there was such a thing as a Sacrament. I lived how I wanted to live, because...well, Jesus loved me and most decent people went to Heaven. Since I was at least decent, I was assured my angel wings. Crazy how I once believed humans became angels upon death. I didn't even understand that we are fundamentally different beings. Anyway... I had no humility. Zero. By the grace of God, I woke up. I'm not perfect at all, but I did realize that our Catholic Faith cannot conform around me. When my pride pulls me to the ways of the world or towards my will, I must resist. Throughout all these years on social media, I have seen the pride that I once had in the comments. There are still so many people who think they can pick and choose what to believe; that they can conform Christianity to their desires and wills. St. Paul talks today about how Jesus emptied Himself and took the form of a slave, not counting equality with God, even though He is God. God humbled Himself to save us and I think we often forget that. When we bow at the mentioning of the Incarnation in the Nicene Creed, we are acknowledging the humility of God, that He would come as one of us. We bow out of respect for counting us worthy of saving in this way. If our God can be so humble, it is imperative that we humble ourselves and submit our will to God and His Church, Catholic Pilgrims. Have a blessed Sunday.
Continue ReadingMy philosophy class at K-State was not so much a philosophy class as it was a Liberal Ideology 101 class. Most of the time was spent having various liberal groups on campus come in and try to persuade us to their side. It was very irritating, because that was not what I signed up for. It caused the professor and me to not be on friendly terms. He punished me, of course, by giving me bad grades and calling me out in class, but I really didn't care. I was the only one in class that ever spoke up and tried to debate against the messages that we were being force fed. It was a very isolating feeling because it felt like me against the world. Yet, it never failed that after each class, other students would come up to me and thank me for speaking up and they would tell me that they agreed with me. They were just too nervous to speak up. However, if I had to be the only one, though, so be it. I learned through that class that speaking the truth can be scary sometimes. You will be punished. You will be hated. Sometimes it will seem like you are all by yourself on an island. But, there are hordes behind you that just aren't as vocal. Here we are 25 years after 9/11 and, for a short period after, we were so united as a country. Suffering often does that, as crazy as that is. Which is why, I think the forces against this country saw that they needed to get to work right away causing division, because that fateful day made us come together in a way I've never seen in my lifetime. Those opposed to us panicked and set to work immediately to try to break the bond that had been created in Americans that actually love this country. They have succeeded in some ways, because we are fractured. All the noise makes us despair and feel hopeless, like all is lost. Yet, praying about this yesterday, I realized that the loudmouths will always seem like they are winning the day and maybe in some areas they are. But there are, also, sane, solo voices out there and behind them are hordes of sane, loyal, patriotic people who just aren't as vocal. Just like in my philosophy class. The loudmouths will always get more attention and make things seem skewed, just like my class. In honor of those that lost their lives on 9/11, may we live our lives with courage, virtue, honor, intelligence, loyalty and faithfulness. Not all is lost. We will never forget. God bless America.
Continue ReadingThis was probably the coolest picture that was sent to me for the small-town showcase back in February. It's also probably the most remote church. It doesn't even really sit in a town, from what I can tell. Mt. Carmel Catholic Church is in North Dakota and it sits nearly on the border of the US and Canada. Information is hard to find on this church, but it looks like it was dedicated and completed in 1953. It also looks to be not in use anymore because of structural concerns, though there is a historical society fighting for its preservation. I've never been to North Dakota, but last year I read a book called, "Giants of the Earth" and I gained a new appreciation for the pioneers that settled in the Dakotas. It took a special kind of person to brave that part of the country and try to tame it. I'm not sure I'm that special kind of person. I can handle Kansas winters, but I'm pretty sure I'd wimp out if I was enduring a North Dakota winter. I'd say if you are ever up at the tippity-top of the country stop in, but I don't think that's possible anymore. It's kind of out there and not operational. I do hope that the historical society is able to find a way to preserve this building. It's an important part of our country's history. Have a great day, Catholic Pilgrims, and live the faith boldly and travel well.
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