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Whenever my husband is mentoring younger military guys, he usually gets around to asking them what they want to do with their life. What are the goals they are reaching for professionally and personally? Most have no answer. They hem and haw around and usually offer something that sounds like a beauty pageant answer: "I just want to make the world better." My husband always presses in and says, "That's not an answer. How are you going to know what to do with an answer as vague as that?" Then it usually comes out that they have no idea what they want to do. They are just floating along and don't really have any kind of vision for their lives. If my husband has learned that they have a wife, he always tells them, "Go home tonight and ask your wife what she sees you doing. Ask her what potential she sees." They always give my husband a curious look, but Dustin will tell you that nine times out of ten, they call back the next day to tell him that was the best conversation they've had in a long time. Dustin will also tell you, that after that conversation, their careers usually take off. I asked him in the car recently what made him start telling these guys to talk to their wives. He said, "Well, women hold the key. A good woman has an incredible ability to unlock a man's potential. If he can see his potential through her eyes, he will be unstoppable." "Too many men lack confidence in themselves. They think they aren't worthy of going for a certain dream, so they don't try. But, when they ask their wives or girlfriends what they see in them, most likely, she will explain to them the potential she sees. It's like a magical gift women have--if you raise the bar for us and show us what we can be, we want to strive for that." "When these guys go home and hear what their wives see in them, all of a sudden they have a purpose and mission, because she gives them confidence. If a woman thinks you are worthy of something or if you are good enough to do something worthwhile, noble, or challenging, listen to her. She often sees what you can't." Ladies, what a beautiful gift we can give to our husbands and, men, go ask your wives. Have a blessed Wednesday.
When leaving California for Colorado last Friday, my plane was on the runway next in line for takeoff when the captain came on and said, "Well, folks, Denver just went on a ground stop for at least an hour, so we are on hold until we hear back from them." Immediately, everyone gave audible groans. The lady next to me got very upset. She snagged a flight attendant walking by and asked if she could get off the plane and go get another flight. The agent told her not at this time as we were sitting on the runway. The lady was ticked and quickly dialed a family member and started cussing up a storm about the situation. We taxied back to the gate and they allowed us to get off for 30 minutes if we wanted. I chose to get off and stretch my legs. When it was time to board again, I got to my seat, saw my grumpy row partner sitting there, and, smiling, I said, "How are you doing?" "Oh, I'm okay, I guess." We preceded to have a conversation and soon she was showing me pictures of her grandkids. When the other row partner sat down, he joined our conversation and soon all three of us were joking and laughing. As we took off, the lady who had once been grumpy grabbed her pillow and said, "Yep, I just try to take things as they come." Then she fell asleep. On my way back from Colorado, I was talking to a gate agent about something and she was clearly irritated. She wasn't super helpful and wasn't listening that well. As I was waiting to get on the flight, I stood right near her counter and could hear her conversations with each person coming up for help. Her responses were snippy and a bit strained with irritation. Once the line was gone, I turned and looked at her. She looked about to burst. I smiled and said, "Deep breaths. You got them all through the line." She actually took that deep breath, relaxed a bit, and said, "It's just been a bit overwhelming." Then she smiled for the first time. I smiled back, "I'm sure, but you've got this." It is so easy to get wrapped up in our own world and our own problems, Catholic Pilgrims. Sometimes all it takes to help someone is just to notice them. As Christians, our eyes should be looking for opportunities to connect with people and offer them charity even in the smallest of ways. Have a blessed Tuesday.
I think a big reason that we struggle with going to Christ and receiving His mercy is because we struggle to give it to others ourselves. Don't get me wrong, I loathe false compassion and false mercy because neither one of those ever help anyone or anything. In fact, they only make things worse. But, when we have a true prudent moment to offer mercy, many of us find it hard to offer it. When we haven't asked Christ for mercy and felt the love that flows from His mercy, it's hard to understand how beneficial that can be for another. I don't remember all the words in St. Faustina's Diary when I read it for Season One of my podcast "Journeying with the Saints," but I do remember the overwhelming message of Christ's mercy. He wants us to come and receive it and be healed by it--all of us. Have a beautiful Divine Mercy Sunday, Catholic Pilgrims.
Several weeks back, I found out that my middle daughter was going to be visiting our oldest daughter at Berkeley over the Easter weekend. Our oldest is a Focus Missionary there. Anyway, since they both were going to be somewhat close, I knew we needed to make the drive to them. I told my daughter to invite a few of the students over who were staying in town and we could have a small-ish Easter meal. Thinking it was going to be around 12 of us, I started planning for a small crowd. Well, that crowd began to swell and swell. Soon, we had around 25 people wanting to come. My husband and I decided that we wanted to dote on the students a bit, so we planned a modified egg hunt. My daughter was worried we were going to make them all run around with baskets and hunt eggs like kids, but I told her to have faith. We bought about 25 eggs of various sizes and filled them with gifts: Some had money, some candy, some religious items. Then we came up with a game called the Great Egg Search/Swap. As we were driving up there, I was worried that if extra people showed up, they wouldn't have an egg. But, I concluded, if they didn't sign up, they got left out. As the game started, I counted the students and we had just enough eggs. But then...more students kept coming. They were all smiling and everyone was so eager to play, I couldn't tell them to just sit it out. So, I ran in my daughter's house and desperately looked for something to put in the extra eggs we had on hand. I prayed that I could come up with something--anything--to include everyone. Amazingly, I started finding things in my purse to give away, including a $50 Old Navy gift card. I ran out to hide them and then went back out front. Then more students showed up and I ran back into the house. Again, I found things to give away out of the supplies I had brought. In the end, every single person had a gift.. It was one of those situations where the Lord provided. It was also incredible how I was so eager to give away things that I probably wouldn't normally have parted with. I just wanted to share and God blessed that. Never doubt what good can come from wanting to bless others, Catholic Pilgrims.
For the past almost nine months, I've been helping as the assistant teacher to the OCIA class at our base chapel. I love to teach, so this was a role I've been desiring for some time now. At the Easter Vigil, I watched as the catechumens came home and it was an emotional experience. That was the first time I had truly handed on the Faith to someone other than my children. Part of me was absolutely thrilled to watch them receive the Sacraments, but there was a tender, grieving part of my heart, too. That official journey with them is over and off they go to pass the faith on themselves. Teaching the faith in OCIA is such a huge responsibility. At the very end, I kept thinking to myself, "Oh, I wish I had taught them this. Oh man, why did I not share this important thing?" But then, the Holy Spirit reminded me that at my entrance to the Catholic Church as a convert, I still had much to learn. I still do. This is the beginning of their journey, I just helped to pass them the light. What a joy to accompany people on their entrance into a life with Christ. It was truly an honor and a blessing. It has filled my soul with immense joy. Welcome home to all those that entered the Catholic Church at Easter! May this journey as a newly minted Catholic Pilgrim be the adventure of a lifetime. Whatever you do, be sure to live the Faith boldly and travel well. "If we pass in the night, then just hand me a light, and Tell me you burned just like me." --Burning Man by Dierks Bentley
I was watching a video the other day on the Passion of Jesus by Edward Siri. At one point, he is standing inside the Holy Sepulcher up on Golgotha. (Yes, it's all inside this massive church.) It brought back a lot of amazing memories of being up there. That's me under the altar there in the picture. See the rocks under the glass cases? Anyway, watching Edward Siri talk, I realized something very profound. Up on Golgotha, there is the space where Christ died. The altar is over the hole in the rock where His cross was stuck in the ground. Facing the altar, over on the right side is a place for Mass. It is beautiful and lighted. Over on the left side, it is dark. Very dark. What's so interesting is that it's dark and huge and it seems to drop off into an abyss. What I realized is that on either side of Jesus hung two thieves. Their responses to Jesus truly reflect the aesthetics up on Golgotha. The "good thief" had the first confession up there on his cross and he repents, asking Christ to remember him. Jesus tells him he will be with him in Paradise. The side with the place for Mass reflects the good thief's decision to come to Christ.--light and beauty. The other thief mocks Jesus and never repents. The side of darkness up on Golgotha reflects his decision to harden his heart and continue to deny Christ up until his last breath. This is the choice laid before all of us: Do we choose to turn to Christ and repent desiring to be with Him in Paradise? Or do we choose to turn away from Christ and be suffocated by our sins to only one day fall off into darkness and the abyss? This Good Friday, as we meditate on Our Savior's Passion, let us do whatever it takes in our lives to always turn towards Christ. May you have a blessed Good Friday, Catholic Pilgrims.
On October 20th, 2020, when my family was living in Izmir, Turkey, we experienced a 7.0 earthquake. My kids and I were on the 15th floor of our apartment building and the building swayed and bucked in the most terrifying and unnatural of ways. For 45 seconds, which seems like an eternity in an earthquake. Certain that the building was coming down on me and my kids, I did all I could think to do and we stood in a door frame praying the Our Father. After it was over, I told my kids to just run. Run out. They ran out with no shoes on and I quickly followed. To make a long story short, the higher ups in the military were worried about a tsunami and so they told my husband to get all military members to higher ground. We ended up in a very poor neighborhood surrounded by Syrian refugees. The contrast in groups could not have been more striking. At one point, a Syrian mother came over to me and started pointing at my feet. I couldn't understand her but it was clear she was asking where my shoes were and the shoes of my children. Through lots of hand gestures, I tried to explain that we just ran out of a tall building. She seemed to ponder this and then walked away. Soon, she came back with shoes for my kids. I was baffled. Here was this poor woman giving to me from the little she had. She saw a mother and her kids in need and she wanted to help. At first, I denied them. I felt horrible taking from her. But, she quickly made it clear that I was not to deny her. I realized that I needed to gratefully accept her gift because she was trying to serve us in some capacity. She was trying to help. She was trying to love. It was one of the greatest acts of charity I have ever received. Peter initially tells Christ not to wash his feet. He doesn't want to be served, he should serve. But, Christ gently rebukes him for this. We find meaning and purpose when we serve others. Sometimes our service to others helps to humble us; sometimes receiving service helps to humble us. It is a great reminder that one of the best ways to love each other is to serve each other, Catholic Pilgrims. Have a blessed Holy Thursday. *These are the shoes given to us.
When I was 17 and turned away from God, I still pretended that I was some kind of stellar Christian. However, I traded a relationship with God to feel comforted by my anger. That's weird to say, but the intense anger I felt was comforting to me. It wasn't real comfort, but it fueled me. But, also, I traded church for sleeping in because I was tired. I traded reading Scripture for watching, listening, and reading whatever secular trash the world could supply me. I traded prayer for doing whatever I wanted to do. All the while, I sat there and lived this barely existent Christian life, yet I had the gall to feign like I wasn't betraying my Lord. "Surely it is not I?" In fact, I did say similar things to Judas in my attempt to pretend like I wasn't one of the betrayers. "Me? Oh, no, not me?" Judas traded the Bread of Life for some money and nearly 2,000 years later we look back and say, "Man, look at him. Gave it all up for thirty pieces of silver. Idiot." However, many give up the Eucharist for even less and we fail to see it. For good music. For an inspiring sermon. For sports. For sleep. For simply the desire to sin while pretending God doesn't see us. There isn't a trade on earth that is worth giving up Christ, Catholic Pilgrims. Nothing could possibly satisfy us like He can. Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Wednesday of Holy Week.
At different times in Jesus’ ministry, He is in danger of people trying to arrest or kill Him. Yet, we always hear that He evades their attempts because His “hour had not come.” Today in our reading from John, I noticed the singular cue where Jesus acknowledges that the hour had come. Jesus says to Judas, “What you are going to do, do quickly.” Then He hands him a morsel and off Judas runs into the night. He runs through the streets of Jerusalem looking for the Pharisees to betray His Lord. As he takes off, Jesus says, “Now is the Son of Man glorified, and God is glorified in Him.” It seems like an odd thing to say at the moment one of your disciples runs off to betray you. But, Jesus has just allowed His hour to come and things are now set in motion. In this, you know that God has been in control the entire time. It had to be the right moment and now Jesus will be glorified through His Passion and Resurrection. In the Garden of Eden it was a bite of food that led to the first betrayal of man. In the Upper Room, Jesus hands Judas a piece of food and off Judas goes to betray. This time, though, the Savior promised at the first betrayal is present. And He will set everything right and be glorified. Have a blessed Tuesday of Holy Week, Catholic Pilgrims. *Picture is an old street in Jerusalem
Have you ever smelled nard, from the spikenard plant? If you haven’t, I hope you get the chance someday. The first time I smelled it in the Holy Land, I couldn’t stop bringing the bottle up to my nose. Imagine what the house smelled like when Mary was anointing Jesus’ feet with the costly nard. The house would have smelled amazing—like mystery and deep love. What strikes me about Mary’s actions in our reading today from John 12 is that Mary can only think of Jesus and her devotion to Him. Her actions signify a desire to pour out every thing for Christ. Judas doesn’t see the pious action for what it’s worth. To him, it’s a waste and ridiculous. When we make a move to give our lives to Christ, Catholic Pilgrims, there will be people who don’t get it. Our devotion will look silly to them or even stupid. They will think we are missing out on something better, like worldly treasures. They may even be envious. At some point in your move to be closer to Christ, someone will try to talk you out of it. It’s “too much” or “a bit over the top.” Pour it all out anyway. Have a blessed Monday of Holy Week. *Picture is of the Spikenard plant
While at my son's jujitsu practice the other day, I was talking with a lady who has a young teenage daughter. We talked about many things and at one point in the conversation, she mentioned that her daughter "believes there's a God, but she doesn't really know what she believes about Him." She continued, "She really has to figure that out for herself. I tell her as long as believing in Him helps her to be good and love people, then that's all the matters." I politely said, "Well, but actually, it's more than that. Jesus didn't come to just help us to be nice people, He came to save us from our sins and offer salvation." She cut me off and started talking about something else that I had to respond to, but I wish I had gotten in one more very important thing about Jesus. It is not enough to just believe that there's a God out there somewhere and that all He wants is for us to be good. In fact, if that is all you think about God, you will find that He completely fades from your mind and you will stop worrying about what is good and what isn't. Your only concern will be what is socially popular. Relationship. You must be in relationship with God. He wants a relationship with us, not just an acknowledgment. That relationship is built by worship at church, prayer, reading God's Word, seeking His will and receiving the Sacraments which give us sanctifying grace. Anyway, I wish I had gotten that in. Maybe I'll get another chance. There is no greater relationship to cultivate than your relationship with the One True God, Catholic Pilgrims. It is well worth the time and effort. Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Friday.
Today was the Lentiest day of all Lent. My car has been in the shop for nearly two weeks…and that’s a whole story. So, with no car, I’ve been having to walk everywhere. Which is fine for the first couple of times, but when you just want to do something quick, it’s not, especially when you live on a base that covers a lot of ground. My hubby is gone, so I’m rolling solo. I miss my cat. And as my son and I were walking to basketball practice, he had to bring all his baseball gear for practice after that. It’s not normally like this, it’s just a few days of overlap. Anywho, we were walking and his bag was weighing him down and he was anxious to get to practice, so, I said, “I’ll carry it, you go on.” He thanked me, lugged me the bag, and ran off to practice. The bag weighs 9,000 pounds. He has approximately 25,000 baseballs, two bats, a helmet, and an entire dugout inside the bag. The thing was heavy and I had to carry it a mile. Today was the day when I was ready for Lent to be done. I wanted some sweets, I wanted to sleep in, I wanted to not have to think of my Lenten practices. As I was hiking with the bag on my back, I was grumping to myself and whining about Lent. And then, I thought, “Amy. That’s enough. These are minor inconveniences. Jesus carried a cross after being scourged up a hill. You’ll be fine and you can always unite this to Christ’s suffering.” It’s so tempting to throw in the towel at this point in our Lenten practices. We’re weary. We’re ready for fun and feasting. But, hang in there, Catholic Pilgrims. It’s all worth it for Christ. *sorry for the mad momma face. I couldn’t see. 😅
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